How Can I Better Communicate with My Child?


Publish date

Feb 2, 2021

Post Author

Healthy U Behavioral Health


When it comes to communicating with your child, it can either be the most straightforward or most challenging process. Regardless, it is essential to set the tone for communication as early as possible. For your child to be utterly comfortable talking with you, you can use some helpful tactics. Some ideas may be simpler than others, but they can all do the trick. Setting the tone for self-expression and being open about inner feelings will allow everyone to be more comfortable discussing issues. 

Setting Time Aside for Communication 

Between cell phones, television, and video games, there are so many things in life that may distract you from adequately communicating when you are at home. Everyone is coming from school and work and wanting to decompress. Although the time for yourself is crucial, it doesn’t hurt to turn everything off and set aside time to discuss the day’s experiences and different thoughts. A great time to effectively communicate with your child is while everyone is at the dinner table. Across the world, dinner time is when everyone gets a chance to forget about what stressed them out during the day to enjoy family time. 

Allow Everyone to Feel

As humans, we have various things that we are continually feeling throughout the day. That’s why everyone must be allowed a healthy space to express their emotions. In some cases, parents may underestimate the severity of their child’s feelings. Some even assume that children couldn’t possibly have any issues because they live a simple life. The truth is, they feel just as much if not more than adults. Allowing your child to express how they feel promotes healthy communication in the household, leading to more open conversations.

Delay Correction 

Sometimes, when children attempt to express emotions that may not be favorable to their parents, it can cause a problem. You must teach your child how to communicate clearly and effectively no matter the situation. Show them that it’s okay to be upset, but ultimately it’s about how they handle it. Instead of getting upset and correcting them, it wouldn’t hurt if you waited to hear them out first. Remember that their feelings are just as valid as your own. Delaying correction and hearing your child out shows them they are listened to in their moments of frustration. 

Understanding Your Child’s perspective 

For some, it can be easy to dismiss the thoughts and feelings of their child, assuming they essentially have nothing to worry about. However, the truth is, no matter what is causing their feelings, they are valid. Who’s to say what’s worthy of being worried about or not? It may be easier said than done, but it’s crucial to see where your child is coming from when they are under stress. Taking the time to understand your child shouldn’t just apply to stressful situations – this goes for any issues they may be having, from school to friendships. Attempting to relate to your child by seeing things through their eyes can help bridge the gap to the ideas and issues adults deem as trivial. Too often, people expect children to understand the thinking of adults. In moments of misunderstanding, it may go smoother if you try to figure out what developmental needs they may have at that moment. If you have a hard time figuring out what your child needs, it may be easier to be as rational and patient as possible. 

Don’t Shame, Promote Proactivity 

Sometimes, when children make mistakes, they are shamed out of frustration. Ultimately, shaming can diminish self-esteem and self-worth. Over time, shaming can cause your child to feel defective. In situations where your child makes mistakes, let them know that it is okay to make mistakes – all humans do. For example, if your child spills something, it can be more beneficial for the relationship if you direct them to clean it up instead of yelling at them. Children don’t know how to correct being defective, but they can learn to correct certain behaviors, especially if given instruction in an encouraging way. 

Even when it comes to disagreements, practice proper communication with your child. Ask them what outcome they want from this specific situation to get the best result. This action will allow them to understand that every problem has different solutions. Children will be more motivated to solve problems if you encourage them to be a part of the solution. 


Properly communicating with your child is an integral part of child development. If you set time aside for quality time with your children, you will have a better communication system. Allow your children to have and express their feelings when the time comes. Everyone has emotions, so it’s essential to teach children that it’s okay to feel them. Instead of shaming them, it may be more beneficial to give them some direction. Take the time to truly understand where your child is coming from by putting yourself in their shoes. Practice explaining and open communication in times of conflict to teach your child how to solve problems. Promoting a healthy conversation through the negative and positive moments in life can help your child grow into healthy-minded adults. There are plenty of ways to practice helping your child learn effective communication. Healthy U can help you and your child grow closer together and create better communication. For more information on learning how to communicate with your children, call us today at (619)-542-9542.